I woke up at 2am, wanting to go to loo. Then I came back to my bed. And after 20 seconds, I wanted to go to loo again. So I went to loo again, then I came back to my bed. Then I wanted to go again. I did this five times. Then I knew I am going to make alot more of flushing sounds, I didn’t want to wake jaydee up.
So I came downstairs, lying down on the sofa. I wanted to go to loo again. So I battled with my need of loo for two hours, then pain started visible. Blood came out quite vividly. And it didn’t stop. I went upstairs, told jaydee. He was so calm. He got up immediately. He said, ‘It’s ok. We are going to A&E in Homorton Hospital, it will take only 10 minutes. and they will give you meds.’
I thought about the night I had appendix surgery when I was 16. Mom took me to the hospital, I crawled to my mum’s bedroom to tell I cannot bear it after four hours of pain, wishing it will all go away. if i bear it.
So we got into the car, pierce dark streets in Hackney, keep all traffic light signs, shake the car over all bumps road. I did not say a word, so did not jaydee. It was beautiful night. I thought how cool would be, if I come out with projector and do guerrilla art projection on to abandoned streets and houses in Hackney. it’s tough town. Hormoton Hospital is in the middle of it. He used to work there for six years, so he didn’t blink eyes to find the right road.
Hospital is not easy place to be. In fact, it’s horrible place to be. There are thousands of bacteria and gems, sick people, rude nurses, boring doctors, bad news… I don’t know how people bear to be a physician. They took urine samples, and asked questions. A nurse, Asian looking nurse was struggling to turn on the PC. She asks when I had my period, so I said ‘last friday’. She asked again, ‘what date is it?’ Grrrr, I don’t know. I am in pain, and your computer fucked. Then one of her colleague came to the room, and give a look, gesture with a hand ‘coffee time’. Great, my nurse with fucked up PC needs to go for coffee time…
She didn’t say ‘follow me’, but she stood up and started walk. so i did too, hoping she is going to take me the office where PC works, or put me with different nurse, or even give me some freaking antibiotics or something.
She didn’t say ‘stop follow me’, but she puts me to the chair where all waitings happen in the hall. I desperately wanted to go to loo again, then I remembered toilet didn’t have a tissue. So I asked reception, ‘you don’t have tissues in the toilet.’ Another rude and pissed off nurse said, ‘go to disable one, they should have tissue.’
When I was struggling to squeeze myself to get blood out from my bladder, there was big hospital announcement, ‘Cleaner, please go to ladies toilet, and refill tissue. The patient complains’. so there we go, i am a complainer here…
I came out, and a young black lady with pink shirt sat down in the black chair, looked depressed badly. She did say ‘follow me’ though. She took me to her office, it was also grim. She said ‘I am DOCTOR ___’ I didn’t catch her name, but whatever. She asked me exactly same questions what asian nurse was asking. difference was Dr had a working computer. But she was typing with index fingers, very very slowly… I had this eager inside of me, wanting to type for her. She asked me same routine questions, and additionally asking family history, fever, allergies etc. Whole process was incredibly slow..
She finally gave me antibiotics. Then I came out from this dark hell, and jaydee drove me home. I sent him to bed, as it was 4:30am. And I drank a hell of water, antibiotics, paracetemols and vinegar. Yeah, funny. My friend who knows quite everything, she says vinegar definitely helps. So I closed my eyes, inhaling with pose, and drank a cup of vinegar. G_reat.
I don’t know which bit cured me. but pain goes away after one hour. I see morning sun is slowly climb up to the sky. I put my head into the sofa, thinking how nightmare can be so vivid and real. Then I woke up, wanting to go to loo.
Then, nightmare wasn’t so dreamy after all. A day passed by, I feel ok now. but for somehow, my desire of wanting to write last night episode resuscitates my dead blog.
so it’s good thing.